Oh George, but did Serenity start a fire with this post. It seems some bus driver whacked some kid who was repeatedly sayin' "penis" even though said bus driver had instructed said kid to cease and desist from doin' so. The full story. Said bus driver was fired and charged criminally over the incident. Serenity says this, as well as most other behavior currently exhibited by our youth, is a sign of what kind of leadership we can expect in the future. She blames poor parentin'. Duh?
Look, sure I don't have none of them li'l rascals of my own, but I have taken a part in raisin' one or two of them. It is YOUR RESPONSIBILITY to instruct every little brat you got a chance to deal with to become a productive and responsible adult. Even though I can't stand the bitch that coined the phrase, it really does take a village.
Rule #1. No child is too young to be instructed in proper behavior.
Rule #2. What is wrong is always wrong, no matter where you are or who is present.
Rule #3. Be consistent.
Rule #4. Explain why the child is bein' punished, make the child explain to you why they are bein' punished then punish the child appropriately.
Rule #5. Never punish out of anger. If you are too angry to explain to the child why it is necessary to punish them and then have them explain back why it is necessary that they are gettin' punished, then you need to abate punishment to a later time.
Rule #6. If corporal punishment is to be meted out to a child, inform the child of the number of strokes to be received prior to beginnin' the punishment.
Rule #7. Never strike a child anywhere but the buttocks, and use only such force as is necessary to cause pain. Pain is the intended result of corporal punishment, not injury.
Rule #8. Use every avenue to instruct. If watchin' somethin' on television and some child exhibits wrong behavior, use such as a teachin' tool to explain why such behavior is wrong. It is best that television shows are limited to those which also show the consequences of the bad behavior.
Rule #9. Check on children frequently. Never just send them off to their room and forget about them. At least once every fifteen minutes stick you head in the door to see what they are doing.
Rule #10. Take a very active part in children's lives. Talk to them on their level and always try to be truthful.
Rule #11. Lead by example. As simple as it sounds, but if you want your children to grow up to be responsible stable citizens, be a stable responsible citizen.
Rule #12. Try to always provide alternative choices with different consequences, ie. You can either clean up your room or sit on that chair over there until your dad comes home. Such instructs children to think about consequences of choices.
All these rules are to be followed throughout childhood. The level of control changes through out the child's life. Be a strict disciplinarian until children start school. Durin' elementary, allow a small amount of freedom, increasin' such as they exhibit the ability to make correct choices about things. Durin' intermediate grades, increase freedom to include the type of books they are able to read, openly discuss ideas. Allow semi-unchaperoned group outings. Durin' High School, allow as much freedom as the child's behavior dictates, but remain a very active part of their lives. Make them work for spendin' money so as to provide a basis for understandin' the value of money.
Just as everyone who reads this is a unique individual, so is every child. What works for one child may not work for its sibling. It is your responsibility to discover how to properly guide each child for which you have responsibility to adulthood. It is not an easy job, that is why two parents are necessary, and why they are supposed to be adults.
Yeah, yeah, I know some of ya'll think I am full of bull, but I can tell ya this much ... my rules and ideas work. I learned most of this from how I was raised, from what my mom and dad did that was right and what they did that was wrong. A lot of the rest I leaned from trial and error. The key is that you try to guide the maturity of children. None of us are perfect and not everything works, but continually trying to find a way to make it happen succeeds more often than not.
Kudos to SilverBlue for pointin' me to Serenity's post
Posted by notGeorge at November 4, 2003 10:41 PMTiger - you're a pretty smart dude! All those things work and are the proper way to raise a child. Teach them to be responsible for their actions and that actions have consequences good and bad.
Posted by: The Bartender at November 5, 2003 07:52 PM