I was testing the children in my Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven. I asked them, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into Heaven?"Bein' it is Friday the 13th, I guess I will have to tell ya'll a little somethin' 'bout some drivin' horror I went through recently. The retellin' is in the extended entry."NO!" the children answered.
"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?"
Again, the answer was, "NO!"
By now I was starting to smile. Hey, this was fun! "Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into Heaven?" I asked them again.
Again, they all answered, "NO!"
I was just bursting with pride for them. Well, I continued, "then how can I get into Heaven?"
A five-year-old boy shouted out, "YOU GOTTA BE DEAD."
After starting a new diet I altered my drive to work to avoid passing my favorite bakery.I accidentally drove by the bakery this morning and there in the window were a host of goodies. I felt this was no accident, so I prayed, "Lord, it's up to you. If you want me to have any of those delicious goodies, create a parking place for me directly in front of the bakery."
And sure enough, God answered my prayer. On the eighth time around the block, there it was!