Read My Lips - the blog

Despite the rumors to the contrary, I am hopelessly bewildered

My grandmother died this past weekend. It comes as no real surprise as I had anticipated the arrival of the event for quite awhile as she looked more frail each time I saw her. On the last few opportunities, she did not recognize me, even after a reminder of my identity. On the very last occasion, this past spring, I even joked with her when she professed that she did not know who I was that it was not so important that she know who I was than it was that I knew who she was. She smiled. We had the viewin' last eve'. Today is the actual ceremony where we will witness the placin' of the body into the hole in the ground. It will be a grand opportunity, as most of my ancestors, or what remain of them, are in and upon the surroundin' ground. I intimated last night that if any of my family should ever be forced to make the decision, I want to be among those whose remains are scattered upon the ground and not placed under it. It seems illogical to use valuable real estate for the storage of empty soft drink cans, which was how I tried to explain the lifeless body of my grandmother to my 4-year-old nephew, Aaron, who readily recognized me, but who has a block when it comes to 'memberin' my name.

With the demise of my grandmother, the straight line lineage is over. I have no direct ancestors left and have direct descendants below. As such, I am a fruitless branch on our family tree. I did come to the decision last evenin', however, that I actually do have a child: my literary tome. I have come to love such production dearly and am quickly growing ready to devote both my efforts and meager finances into the development of such progeny.

My navel seems to have very little concern of late, as well, bein' mired in wonderment as to the purpose of all these comments from 69.193.88.30, where some supposed named individual leaves an innocuous comment with an email address usin' that same name, as well as a Internet domain name along the order of http://www.identicalname.com. Other than the minuscule nuisance of the mystery surroundin' the appearance of such, there appears to be no other worthwhile purpose. End of report.