You're from a small town if...Lest you find this too funny, too many of these are right on point. Seriously. Posted by Tiger at November 19, 2004 08:18 AM | TrackBack
- You can name everyone you graduated with.
- You know what 4-H is.
- You ever went to parties at a pasture, barn, or in the middle of a dirt road.
- You used to drag "main."
- You said the 'f' word and your parents knew within the hour.
- You schedule parties around the schedule of different police officers, since you know which ones would bust you and which ones wouldn't (same goes with the game warden).
- You ever went cow-tipping or snipe hunting.
- You could never buy cigarettes because all the store clerks knew how old you were (and if you were old they'd tell your parents anyhow).
- When you did find someone old enough and brave enough to buy cigarettes, you still had to go out to the country and drive on back roads to smoke them.
- You have ever gone home for Homecoming.
- It was cool to date someone from the neighboring town.
- You had senior skip day.
- The whole school went to the same party after graduation.
- You don't give directions by street names or directions by references (turn by Nelson's house, go two blocks east Anderson's, and it's four houses left of the track field).
- You can't help but date a friend's ex-girlfriend or boyfriend).
- Your car stays filthy because of the dirt roads, and you will never own a dark vehicle for this reason.
- You think kids that ride skateboards are weird.
- The town next to you is considered "trashy" or "snooty", but is actually just like your town.
- You refer to anyone with a house newer than 1980 as the "rich people".
- The people in the city dress funny, then you pick- up on the trend two years later.
- You bragged to your friends because you got pipes on your truck for your birthday.
- Anyone you want can be found at either the Dairy Queen or the feed store.
- You see at least one friend a week driving a tractor through town.
- Football coaches suggest that you haul hay for the summer to get stronger.
- Directions are given using "the" stop light as a reference.
- Your letter jacket was worn after your 19th birthday.
- You have ever taken a trailer or dog to school on a daily basis.
- Weekend excitement involves a trip to a Wal-Mart.
- Even the ugly people enter beauty pageants.
- You decide to walk somewhere for exercise and 5 people pull over and ask if you need a ride.
- Your teachers call you by your older siblings names.
- Your teachers remember when they taught your parents.
- You can charge at all the local stores.
- The closest McDonald's is 45 miles away.
- So is the closest mall.
- It is normal to see an old man riding through town on a riding lawnmower.
I always got *so* mad on 4-H speech days when I'd come back to the classroom and *never* have a ribbon on my desk! My speeches were *good*, dangit! And...um...10 years after graduation, you mean I'm not supposed to still be wearing my letter jacket?
On the other hand, my little hometown had the top grossing Wal-Mart in the country for *years*. To this day, you can drop in at 3 a.m. and still have to wait for a cashier.
Posted by: Seuss at November 19, 2004 09:18 AMOh my gosh, that's my home town! Living in suburban Detroit now, we're not in KS anymore Toto!
Posted by: Jema at November 19, 2004 02:05 PMYa missed one: You never lose a dog, everyone knows your dog and which horndog screwed which bitch to produce it.
snipe hunting. Heh.
Egads, 1950-60's any burg along Hwy 99, in California's Central Valley.
I can attest to about 90 percent of the above...it would probably have been higher, but I took my GED instead of graduating! ;-)
--TwoDragons
Posted by: Denita TwoDragons at November 20, 2004 12:33 AM