November 19, 2004

November 19, 2004

You're from a small town if...
  1. You can name everyone you graduated with.
  2. You know what 4-H is.
  3. You ever went to parties at a pasture, barn, or in the middle of a dirt road.
  4. You used to drag "main."
  5. You said the 'f' word and your parents knew within the hour.
  6. You schedule parties around the schedule of different police officers, since you know which ones would bust you and which ones wouldn't (same goes with the game warden).
  7. You ever went cow-tipping or snipe hunting.
  8. You could never buy cigarettes because all the store clerks knew how old you were (and if you were old they'd tell your parents anyhow).
  9. When you did find someone old enough and brave enough to buy cigarettes, you still had to go out to the country and drive on back roads to smoke them.
  10. You have ever gone home for Homecoming.
  11. It was cool to date someone from the neighboring town.
  12. You had senior skip day.
  13. The whole school went to the same party after graduation.
  14. You don't give directions by street names or directions by references (turn by Nelson's house, go two blocks east Anderson's, and it's four houses left of the track field).
  15. You can't help but date a friend's ex-girlfriend or boyfriend).
  16. Your car stays filthy because of the dirt roads, and you will never own a dark vehicle for this reason.
  17. You think kids that ride skateboards are weird.
  18. The town next to you is considered "trashy" or "snooty", but is actually just like your town.
  19. You refer to anyone with a house newer than 1980 as the "rich people".
  20. The people in the city dress funny, then you pick- up on the trend two years later.
  21. You bragged to your friends because you got pipes on your truck for your birthday.
  22. Anyone you want can be found at either the Dairy Queen or the feed store.
  23. You see at least one friend a week driving a tractor through town.
  24. Football coaches suggest that you haul hay for the summer to get stronger.
  25. Directions are given using "the" stop light as a reference.
  26. Your letter jacket was worn after your 19th birthday.
  27. You have ever taken a trailer or dog to school on a daily basis.
  28. Weekend excitement involves a trip to a Wal-Mart.
  29. Even the ugly people enter beauty pageants.
  30. You decide to walk somewhere for exercise and 5 people pull over and ask if you need a ride.
  31. Your teachers call you by your older siblings names.
  32. Your teachers remember when they taught your parents.
  33. You can charge at all the local stores.
  34. The closest McDonald's is 45 miles away.
  35. So is the closest mall.
  36. It is normal to see an old man riding through town on a riding lawnmower.
Lest you find this too funny, too many of these are right on point. Seriously. Posted by Tiger at November 19, 2004 08:18 AM | TrackBack
Comments

I always got *so* mad on 4-H speech days when I'd come back to the classroom and *never* have a ribbon on my desk! My speeches were *good*, dangit! And...um...10 years after graduation, you mean I'm not supposed to still be wearing my letter jacket?

On the other hand, my little hometown had the top grossing Wal-Mart in the country for *years*. To this day, you can drop in at 3 a.m. and still have to wait for a cashier.

Posted by: Seuss at November 19, 2004 09:18 AM

Oh my gosh, that's my home town! Living in suburban Detroit now, we're not in KS anymore Toto!

Posted by: Jema at November 19, 2004 02:05 PM

Ya missed one: You never lose a dog, everyone knows your dog and which horndog screwed which bitch to produce it.

snipe hunting. Heh.

Egads, 1950-60's any burg along Hwy 99, in California's Central Valley.


Posted by: feste at November 19, 2004 08:53 PM

I can attest to about 90 percent of the above...it would probably have been higher, but I took my GED instead of graduating! ;-)

--TwoDragons

Posted by: Denita TwoDragons at November 20, 2004 12:33 AM