December 11, 2004

Sorry I'm late, but I got sideswiped by a zinger

Ha ha! Take that Batman! That got your attention! GOOD. I've got somethin' to say, but I forgot what it was. Wait, I'm sure we did this gag before. Any of ya'll wanna search the archives for the reference point? I know some of ya'll are kinda petty 'bout the rules. Then some of ya only be concerned wid da rulz! Then some of ya'll jes' don't care and are clickin' out already. 'N' ya'll're gonna the ones to miss the good stuff.

I have been doin' so much BE surfin' these las' few days and am comin' 'cross a lot of new bloggers. I mean 'tain't 'zactly like I'm Glenn Reynolds or Dave Winer or some of them other bloggers that took up the habit sometime las' century, but I'm past the 18-month mark ~clock jes' struck midnight for ya'll highly particular people who fret so much 'bout the dates~ and that makes me a fully qualified toddler-level blogger, or is that bloggist? It could be blogologist! Such high status now allows me to toddle in here and tell ya'll somethin' 'bout the art, essence, or purpose of bloggin'. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Virginia, I know it ain't like I ain't done it a few times previously, but ag'in, it's gonna be your job to search the archives for those reference points, 'cause I've got some bloggin' advice to give. This really ain't gonna be like I ever have done this before. It prolly ain't like no one done it before, 'cause so far as I know, ain't no one ignorant enough to do stuff like I do it, no how.

So, I know that suspense is really startin' to itch ya, so here it is. Bloggin' is mostly jes' 'bout personality. PERIOD. Whenever ya begin to blog, ya breathe life into a livin' document. You have , in effect, created a thing called blog. Blog has a visual presence: a hopefully unique look or appearance. Due to a variety of browsers, resolutions, and screen qualities, such look can be very different to many different visitors. You want to take pride in the face you present to the public via your blog. Ya should be wantin' to show a face 'pon which other people will enjoy lookin', 'least those certain ones that might actually even care to hear what it is that ya have to say. That is the other part. Your blog has to have a voice and it must have somethin' of interest to your intended audience. Bloggin' is a lot like real life: cliques develop, and soon ever'one finds their niche in the blogosphere.

I ain't gonna tell ya'll what to do or how to do it, 'cause if'n I knew how to be the best blogger in the world, Glenn Reynolds wouldn't be sittin' atop the pyramid and I wouldn't be languishin' 'mong the masses mired in the middle of the herd. Jes' be yourself and allow your voice be heard. But before I let ya get back to doin' that, I actually do have one last thing that I want to tell all of ya'll Blogger users: Blogger templates are the epitome of pathetic. I mean, it ain't that those templates are so atrocious, well -- a couple of 'em really are pretty horrible -- it is jes' that about 5000 other people are also usin' the same one you are usin'. Tweak somethin', people! Learn some .css or pay some of these other bloggers a few bucks to do it for ya. While mos' of the rest of us have already discovered that blog*spot doesn't really offer reliable service, my not-so-limited experience has likewise disclosed that there are a lot of other places that don't either. Thankfully, Pixy takes care of us Munuvians. ~knock on wood~ Blog on, brothers and sisters, blog on!! Jes' 'member this one thin' if ya 'member nothin' else -- I personally have a ver' hard time findin' fault with any blog 'pon whose blogroll I find displayed a prominent link to my own blog: Read My Lips.

Now with the way this post began, did any of ya'll think it would end up bein' somethin' like this? Even I couldn't have predicted such and it was my brain responsible for regurgitatin' all of that. I 'spose then, that we was all a bit s'prised 'bout that change of direction. I'm gonna lay the blame for such squarely 'pon my navel. End of report.

Posted by Tiger at December 11, 2004 01:00 AM | TrackBack
Comments

Yeah, the new Blogger designs are quite smart, but there's four of them, and four million Bloggerers.*

* All numbers approximate.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at December 11, 2004 04:06 AM