In the days since the election, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age," an official said.That test seems pretty harsh, though, 'cause I am an actual grey-headed guy and ain't sure I could pick Lawrence Welk, himself, outta of a lineup. [UPDATE: I musta really liked this column 'cause this is the second time I posted on it.]
I need a new "Mystery Date" because the one you brought me in 1969 has finally worn out. (Poindexter was the only date left anyway!).I mean, how is Poindexter gonna get a date now? He was havin' a hard enough time when he was the only choice other than turnin' lesbian.***
I just gave each of you $10 Million dollars to do anything with it you would like. You can blow it all or set long term goals for your future. You are a Genuine Millionaire. Now tell me what you would do. You can put it here in comments or post it on your own site. I really am curious about how you are going to spend your money. Give us all a peek. Invite us into your Walter Mitty world.I'd like to give it a go, but not right now. I am too busy tryin' to stay on this board.
*Oops, had to cut this adventure short cause some very sweet person gifted me with 4:00p.m. tickets to the Cirque du Soleil. [footnote addendum: I had to go to the office to access and print the files transferred to me via gmail, which, due to a firewall or whatever, I cannot access from the office. Upon printin' out the tickets, I found that they were actually for tomorrow afternoon -- which is a very good thing.]
**See the comments.
***The statistics regardin' the number of young ladies who opted for a change in sexual orientation so as not to be forced to date Poindexter are skewed and, unRatherlike, I won't publish material which cannot be fully autheniticated, Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk!
Posted by Tiger at December 2, 2004 01:33 PM