November 24, 2004

OUCH, that hurts! I really mean it!

Snarky inane prolific writer sought for position as blogmate on this site.
Earlier today, I arose from my chair as I do often on a regular basis several times a day, when I heard a pop along one side of my lowest vertebrae followed immediately by another pop on the opposite side of that same vertebrae. I knew immediately that such spelled disaster for my holiday weekend. Throughout the day, my back has stiffened and is very painful. I tried to lay down earlier, but my mattress has been in a bad need of turnin' for several months, but I had not been able to successfully line up someone to assist me in flippin' that king-sized monstrosity. I went to the convenience store that I regularly haunt and the staff there, which sees me so often, could tell I was in distress. I explained the situation and one of the employees, a high school football player, agreed to come over to assist me with the mattress flippin' when he got off of work at 8:00 pm. When he had not shown by 8:30, I reluctantly took on the job single-handedly, and successfully wrestled that mattress off of the bed, then lifted the part that was on the floor until I could slide it up onto and over my body as I was laid back over the box springs. The turn was eventually completed and I remade the bed, usin' a completely brand new set of sheets I purchased several months ago. The single-handed mattress turnin' severely aggravated the trauma to my already achin' back. I doubt I'll be goin' any where for T'Day now. I might not even be able to get out of bed. I 'spect all the chiropractors will be takin' the day off, anyhow. ~insert French language lyrics from ancient Doris Day movie~ Although my navel is in the same general area as the injured vertebrae, it appears to be unaffected. End of report. Posted by Tiger at November 24, 2004 09:39 PM

You are taking on another writer?

Mattress turning I can do. Snarky inane prolific writing up to your standards - NBL*. In fact I don't think there is anyone up to your standard in the blogs I read :-)

[* Aussie for Not Very Likely except that Very is replaced with the Great Australian Adjective.]

Posted by: Ozguru at November 27, 2004 10:59 PM

Oh, there's a few 'mong the ones I read. ;) Maybe I need to rephrase it to read:

Seekin' prolific readers of snarky inane writin'
Now, mate, the B wouldn't stand for Bloomin', would it?

Posted by: Tig at November 27, 2004 11:26 PM

Ummm. No. It was Bl**dy.

Posted by: Ozguru at November 28, 2004 01:25 AM

Well, I Bloody should have known that!

Posted by: Tig at November 28, 2004 09:04 AM

No, you bloody well shoulda known that.

Get the slang right and you can talk to anyone, even those who supposedly speak the same language...

Posted by: Kathy K at November 28, 2004 06:21 PM

P.S. One of the reasons I enjoy reading you is because you write in your local vernacular...

I like it on the rare occasions that OzGuru does the same.

Posted by: Kathy K at November 28, 2004 06:24 PM

(As long as I'm spamming your comments anyway...)

And one of the reasons I enjoy it is that you'd never use the term 'local vernacular' while talking in it. ;)

Posted by: Kathy K at November 28, 2004 06:28 PM